The Three Little Pigs Choose Careers

By Michael Edmonds 15/01/2012 2

Once upon a time there were three little pigs who, having completed high school, were deciding what to do next.

The first little pig said ‘I want to make lots of money. Mr Moo at the nutritional supplement store says I can work for him, and if I work really hard flogging off dubious supplements with high mark ups to gullible people, I could have my own store in five years.’

The second little pig said ‘That is far too mercenary for my taste. I want a career that helps people, so I’m going to become a homeopath, and give out potions and advice that makes them feel better.’

The third little pig said ‘Homeopathy isn’t supported by scientific evidence, but I too want to help people as well as develop a better understanding of how the world around me works. So I’m going to become a scientist and look at new ways to treat diseases.’

And the first pig snorted ‘Good luck with that, I’ll have my first million before you even finish university.’

And the second pig shook his head and said ‘But there’s more to life than evidence.’

So the three little pigs moved out into the world and followed their chosen career paths.

The first little pig worked hard and did indeed earn lots of money, establishing his own chain of nutritional supplement stores. He even expanded into natural remedies, importing cheap concoctions from third world countries with no check on their contents. The high mark ups gave him plenty of money to deal with occasional law suit due to the high heavy metal content of several of these products. His working motto was ‘if they’ll believe it, I’ll sell it.’

The second little pig looked at all the options to study homeopathy. The two month online course looked a bit dodgy to him, so he completed a local four year diploma course which also included Bach flower remedies and reikki training. After completing his training he set up a practice treating animals from across the city. He did well as all of the animals thought he was caring and kind, and he subconsciously chose to only treat self limiting conditions.

The third little pig went to university and studied science for four years before travelling overseas to do more study. She learnt all about different diseases and new scientific treatments for them. She then returned to her home city and began work in a university laboratory.

Ten years later, when all of the little pigs were enjoying their lives, along came swine flu.

The first little pig lost most of his customers because most of them were too scared to frequent a business run by a pig. He had to close most of his shops and remortgage his house just to stay afloat.

The second little pig found all his potions were useless against the flu. Worst still, during a reikki session he contracted the flu, and became very sick. He spent many days huffing and puffing trying to breathe.

The third little pig had been studying antiviral compounds at her lab and was able to work with other scientists to develop an appropriate treatment for swine flu. This was developed in time to help many sick pigs, including her brother.

After everyone had been treated and the swine flu subsided, the third little pig and her research team received the Nobel prize for their life saving work. She was promoted to professor and led a large team of researchers on to find new cures for other diseases.

The second little pig, disillusioned with his first career choice retrained as a counsellor, which made far better use of his caring nature and listening skills.

The first little pig eventually rebuilt his health store business but sadly, falling for his own hype, died from mercury poisoning after taking a dubious remedy for erectile dysfunction.


2 Responses to “The Three Little Pigs Choose Careers”